Hilarious Letter of the Day....

Hilarious Letter of the Day....
Current mood: amused
Category: Life

I gave him some horror to embrace.

Ok. I'll look forward to seeing your cute ass but on your face.

Night.

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:58 AM

hey i really need to go to bed. lets meet for coffe soon. ill write you tomorrow
later, tim.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:50 AM


Yeah, yeah..I'm a girl but there's just this thing... it's TOTALLY small. No one ever sees it. I used to think it had teeth and it bothered me but it doesn't.

It's WAY small !! It's like inside. You didn't tell your roomates did you?? Please don't tell anyone...

It's like the size of......a macaroni noodle.

Otherwise I'm ALL woman!!!

I just think too many people start things off based on lies.....ya know??

I have big boobs!!

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:44 AM

exactly where is your non penis tail thing

how big is it

do you also have a hooha


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:36 AM

Oh. Can I tell you something REALLY personal?? I mean...I have...well, I'm not really like all the other girls. Man, I hope you don't tell anyone about this 'cause I would just DIE!!! I have this thing....it's like um.....it's sorta like a penis but it really isn't a penis, it's just an appendage. You know how some people are born with a tail but it's not really a tail?? It's sorta like that!

You can't see it, it's really small. I'm so ashamed, but I think its better that you know about it now. I'm totally not gay - I love men. You're the only one who knows besides my Mom and my doctor.

But since we might end up having sex, I just want to tell you everything and be totally honest.

:0(

I feel like crying.....and peeing my pants.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:30 AM


i didnt know theses people existed. im not really into porn.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights

Thats cool. Check out this Ad - do you feel like these people are targeting you? I hate all these advertisements!!

Harm of Porn Addiction
Porn hurts relationships, marriage. See research.
NoPornNorthampton.org

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:25 AM


lets do the coffe thing and then if you dont like what you see then you can bolt nsa. me i dont have any expectations that you wont meet phisicaly. im easy going.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:19 AM


So if you look like your ass then what? We go have coffee? See a movie?

But what if I don't like what I see....what should I do? What would you suggest I do if you don't look like your ass?

What would you do if I didn't look like me ass?

~Samantha - Do you like my name, by the way??? You never said.



----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:16 AM

unless we meet in a dark room you should have time to see me before its too late

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada LightsDate: Apr 12, 2007 12:14 AM


How do I know you're not lying to me

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:13 AM

really

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:11 AM

Are you totally sure you're as cute as your butt??

You better not be teasing me..!


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:10 AM

when huh? cool

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada LightsDate: Apr 12, 2007 12:07 AM

I know huh!! I hope you don't get the foot fungus when we have sex. Maybe I could just wear a sock.

That's cool. I'm not really working right now. I wish I knew of a way to make some money.



Well, I'm gonna go to sleep because I'm tired and stuff.
Maybe we can talk tomorrow. Tell your friends I said bye and enjoy the ganja hooka. Puff Puff.

NIght!

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 12, 2007 12:03 AM


no i was just taking a nap i have a bed.
im the BLAH BLAH of a BLAH BLAH BLAH.
sucks about the foot thing

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:58 PM

I really like the way you matched your underwear with your profile - the whole Hawaiian theme really ties in.

Do you sleep on that couch?

What do you do, by the way?? If I can ask that...

Dude!! There's something wrong with my foot. The skin on the side of my foot is all hard and looks like a tree. I'm not even kidding!

It's like a tree-foot.
:0(

Weird!

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:55 PM

me, i would have to be really bored with someone to feel the need for marshmallows but hey like i said im cool with most things. the hands i got, damn good ones. and condoms wont be a problem.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:50 PM

So are you saying you have a fat rooster? I love chickens! This conversation is making me hot.

Do you have any money??? To buy condoms Where do you live??

I have a perversion for marshmellows. I like to have sex with 'em. Does that bother you? Maybe we could stick a bunch of them end on end and make a toy out of them. I come up with all sorts of kinky ideas...what about you?

I also like mens hands....

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:44 PM

the thighs are muscle i swear.

and never any complaints.


I think I'm gonna start on a ....you know....so I'm REALLY horny - guess that rules out any XXX sex huh!

That's all you want? To go to the closet with me? I don't know why I like the closet.....I just do.

You kinda have fat thighs. What else do you have that's fat???


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:35 PM

yellow with an orange hawaiin print

you would be a good girl if you invite me to the closet with you next time.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:32 PM

Yeah? How can I be a good girl?? Tell me, tell me.

I was just looking at your picture again - are those paisley?? Cause I LOVE paisley!! It's my fav!

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:30 PM

if your a really good girl

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:28 PM


Can I put lipstick on you and make out with you then????

Would you wear my panties? I wear thongs too....I LOVE them!!

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:27 PM


nothing romantic about me in a dress

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:26 PM

That's because I AM bitchin' !! Like Harley's are bitchin' - like the American Flag - like a good thong on a hot day. On the beach perhaps..

I'm also romantic. As you can see.

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:24 PM

thats too bad i was starting to think you were bitchen

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:22 PM


Well then our conversation is over.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:18 PM


im a pretty open guy but sorry cant do the dress thing. tyoull just have to settle for a thong.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:14 PM

Do you always wear thongs? That's pretty hot...

Would you wear a dress for me?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:02 PM


my roomates are smoking a hooka and watching tv


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:00 PM


Oh, who's that??

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 11:00 PM


everyone in the room says yes

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 10:58 PM


are you sure you're as cute as your butt??

~samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 10:57 PM


well then i can cut my forplay down to just a couple of hours then.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 10:55 PM

But I already went in the closet and XXX....


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 10:53 PM



wow you know a lot of shit, you should come over.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights

Are you insane??? Living with a GIRL?? EW!!

You guys talk about shit? Why? Does that girl like talking about shit too? People shit or dog shit? Ferret shit? What about Winnie the Pooh?

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: tim
Date: Apr 11, 2007 10:47 PM


no no. i really am not just looking for sex. i just want to meet some cool people. i live with a couple of friends (one is even a girl) <<-- and we like to have people over just to chill and talk about shit. not to say im not interested, but i not just looking for it.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights

So you want a gang-bang??

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: A TOTAL DOrk!
Date: Apr 11, 2007 10:37 PM


actually i meant for you to come over here.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 9:25 PM

Oh?? YOU invite yourself AND your friends over?? Thats a new tactic tried by the man-species.....interesting! But no.

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: A TOTAL Dork!

actually i have gotten much much more attention with this pic and this attitude than i ever did whith a face pic and a sincere profile. im not hiding any super ugliness i just want to make you all wait to see me in person. i promise im as cute as my own ass. <<--LOL @ that!!
im not even looking for sex or anything serious anymore but if it comes along great. i just want to have fun and meet chicks that arent after money. come over sometime and let me and my friends make you laugh. were cool and safe./
tim.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Nevada Lights
Date: Apr 11, 2007 8:55 PM

You cant get any serious attention from the babes because your picture makes you look like a fag or a pervert.

Clean yourself up, pal.

And put some pants on!

~Samantha

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: A TOTAL Dork!
Date: Apr 11, 2007 4:49 PM


hi, what u doin

9:25 PM - 8 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment
Nevada Lights


Well, there was another right after that one.....

"My name is XXXXX but everyone calls me troll, dont worry im not a real troll,<<---
im out tonight looking for people to talk with and I was hoping to talk with you about anything that you would like to talk about im just looking to meet some new friends, there is nothing wrong with the friends that I already have it just that I would like more friends thats not wrong is it?If you dont mind talking with a man named troll, please write me back if you can have a good nightand be safe. troll"

Posted by Nevada Lights on Wednesday, April 11, 2007 at 9:33 PM
[Reply to this]
Baboon Rising


hahah. That is quite an imagination you have there Mingo. BTW, I have awful hands with dirt under my fingernails ALL THE time. ahaha.

Posted by Baboon Rising on Thursday, April 12, 2007 at 4:37 AM
[Reply to this]
Nevada Lights


If we met face to face I would frown wit5hout even know it. Just like I smile without knowing it. Dirt is not OK. Just say no..


Posted by Nevada Lights on Thursday, April 12, 2007 at 9:06 AM
[Reply to this]
Baboon Rising


If you met me face to face, you'd prolly barf, not jsut frown. haha. BTW, I was kidding about the dirt under my nails. I only have dirt there when i work hard outside doing lawn duties. I wash my hands afterwards. But, I don't have the most attractive hands. I'm sure you'd hate them.

Posted by Baboon Rising on Thursday, April 12, 2007 at 9:43 AM
[Reply to this]
Nevada Lights


Its not attractiveness of the hands. It's how the person holds things, how they touh things, hand gestgures. It's the hands in relation to other hings. The same goes for the mouth in relation to the teeth. However, th TEETH tell more than the lips. I don't know how to explain that.

If I dont like someone hands - I can't even be around that person. I choose my friends by their hands and teeth.

Posted by Nevada Lights on Thursday, April 12, 2007 at 9:48 AM
[Reply to this]
Baboon Rising


I think my teeth are okay. I take pretty good care of them. I don't think I have bad lips. I like the lips and teeth on a woman as well. I understand what you are saying about the hands and the way they move.

Posted by Baboon Rising on Thursday, April 12, 2007 at 10:15 AM
[Reply to this]
Baboon Rising


Oh hey Samantha! Did the conversation continue beyond this exchange? Did you find out if he was a cosnervative or not? So many questions. Does he like guns? What's his take on the second law of thermodynamics?

Posted by Baboon Rising on Thursday, April 12, 2007 at 11:36 AM
[Reply to this]
Nevada Lights


This is the entire conversation from beginning to end. I had the same questions for him. I was going to ask him what he thought about Bush and oil, etc. Hopefully no one tells him about this blog and he writes me back. He smokes a LOT of pot!!

He invited me over - most likely to smoke pot and then I heard today that some ppl in San Dog did that same thing but the "guests" robbed them. If he invites me again, would you also like to go and we'll rob him and room mates. I get that dibs on the couch though. I like the way he says "If this couch could talk" - like he gets a lot of action on the couch. The whole aspect of this guy just facinates me.

~samantha


Posted by Nevada Lights on Thursday, April 12, 2007 at 1:04 PM
[Reply to this]