I've Decided I Really Need a Man.....

I've Decided I Really Need a Man.....
Current mood: horny
Category: Life


Why? Because men - even ugly ones - seem appealing lately. And I'm tired of paying all of the bills myself!!

Rush Limbaugh keeps toying with me - he keeps getting cuter and cuter and cuter and cuter and cuter with age but has not accepted any of my sexual advances......so where does this leave me?

That's right.......going without and suffering. It leaves me eating chocolate and drinking lots and lots of coffee.

I'm so tired I can hardly see this screen or the words written on it and I feel like I need - not one man - but an entire herd of men....

By rights I should be out screwing the railing on any staircase that's not being used. I mean...why am I still such a prude when I'm TOTALLY single, alone and crazy filled with lust??

If you people could email Rush Limbaugh - rush@eibnet.com - and tell him that I want him in a dirty sexual way......that would be great!

You can cut and paste this entire comment if you want.........here I'll write a bit for him....

"Dear Rush...no, no....Dear Big Daddy...nooo..Dear Big Cat Daddy,

My name is Samantha, I live in Las Vegas, I have big boobies (you like boobies dontch'a??), I'm honest (painfully so) and I just wanna bone all day.

You know who I am because we connect mentally (on a deep, deep level and you KNOW what I mean!) - now can we connect physically??

I want you!!

Love and Hips Thrusts,
Samantha"

If Rush declines me again (he ALWAYS DOES..) then I will have to settle for one of you losers. Form a line and take a number.

Thanks!!

Love Always,
Samantha - Delirious and Bored in Las Vegas

5:15 PM - 14 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment
kris, mexican-minuteman


WHOA THERE!!! I GUESS WOMEN CAN BE HORNIER THAN MEN!!!!

Posted by kris, mexican-minuteman on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 9:31 PM
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Nevada Lights


Damn straight we can!!

Better behave before I beat you with my wooden leg.......

Posted by Nevada Lights on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 9:44 PM
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"THE DEMON SLAYER"


You can ride me until I'm raw!

Posted by "THE DEMON SLAYER" on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 9:59 PM
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kris, mexican-minuteman


Feeling sore just thinking about it.

Posted by kris, mexican-minuteman on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 10:05 PM
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"THE DEMON SLAYER"


Hey Sam you started this!

Posted by "THE DEMON SLAYER" on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 10:09 PM
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kris, mexican-minuteman


Yep, she did

Posted by kris, mexican-minuteman on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 10:14 PM
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Nevada Lights


You freakin' retards....lol

Posted by Nevada Lights on Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 10:18 PM
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Baboon Rising


Well, I'm one of the ugly ones. I feel especially ugly now that I have to come up with about 5 grand to replace my heat pump. So, sadly, that's the only "pumping" I'm thinking of now.

Posted by Baboon Rising on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 at 4:10 AM
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DRAGON RIDER


Posted by DRAGON RIDER on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 at 5:25 AM
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Nevada Lights


LOL @ "pump"

- what kind of pump did you say that was Baboon???

Posted by Nevada Lights on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 at 8:14 AM
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Baboon Rising


It's gonna be either a Lennox, Trane, or Frigidaire. Lennox and Trane are rated fairly well from what I understand. But, there is very little information on the net about them. I'm not sure about Frigidaire. Any advice from your readers or you is welcomed My Armstrong piece of crap heat pump now is rated SEER 10. The Govt. efficiency rating standards went up to 13 as of last year, which means I'll be spending a lot more money on a heat pump. Sorry, Its not the other kind of pump you are thinking abut. But, I don't think I'm in need of one of those.

Sometimes, I hate being a homeowner.

Posted by Baboon Rising on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 at 8:22 AM
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Nevada Lights


I don't care about any of that - I just want to hear about the c*ck pumps and the c*cks in them - now go away!

Stop boring me!!

Posted by Nevada Lights on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 at 8:25 AM
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Baboon Rising


What the heck are those things for anyway? I don't get it. Are they supposed to make you bigger or something?

Posted by Baboon Rising on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 at 9:02 AM
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Nevada Lights


I don't know - I know 2 guys that use them and one is over 10" and the other one is about as big around as a soda can. But one is Italian - the 10" guy.

For some reason I have not slept with either one of these guys - I must be crazy. LOL

I'm going to the corner to cry now.....

Posted by Nevada Lights on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 at 9:12 AM
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